PERFECT PARENTING: WHAT LILLIAN HAS TAUGHT ME SO FAR.
Happy Monday! I hope everyone had a great weekend- I know with the Supreme Court ruling there was a lot to celebrate! Growing up in the Castro, it is fascinating to see how much has changed, even in San Francisco, over the last decade. I've been meaning to write a longer reflection piece on my experience of the Castro and hope to do that sooner rather than later, so stay tuned!
It's been just over three weeks since our Little Miss Lillian was born. She has been such a blessing to us and to our family and friends. We have loved every day with her and honestly, there isn't a day that goes by that I don't have a moment of happiness and say, "oh my heavens, Jesse, we have a baby! I can't believe it!". Talking with other moms and reading a lot about parenting I don't think anyone really mentions the disbelief of having your own child. Don't misinterpret the disbelief as frustration or me being upset- rather, it's the opposite. I think how did I get so stinkin' lucky to have this darling little person enter my life. A few months after having Camilla, my sister Caitlin said to me, "I just can't remember life before her" and it's absolutely true with our Lil' Lil.
So what could my daughter have taught me in three weeks? I am grateful to learn: A LOT. I wanted to share some of it here! I'd love for parents to chime in as well!
- My love for her oozes and is ceaseless. Parental love is like nothing else (still, so weird that I'm a parent!!!). It literally wraps you up and takes all of your cares away.
- I love Jesse more because of Lillian. I know marital conflict can be at an all-time high because of the stress, but Jesse and I have been working so well together and I fall in love with him even more when I see how much he loves our Little One.
- Family is so important. This is a no-brainer, but I have been reminded every day about the special relationship I have with my family.
- Baby poop is funny. And baby farts supply endless hours of laughs. Let's just say that Little Miss Lillian has great plumbing and she is not embarrassed to let them rip-- especially in our Mommy & Me Classes with a full audience.
- Time goes by SO fast. I was lucky this wasn't the case for me, but I've heard many moms complain about how slowly their pregnancy is going (I actually felt like once I got to six months it flew by). Fast forward to holding your newborn and it feels like time is moving at light speed. I mean, how is she three weeks already?
- Numbers don't matter. Maybe because I'm not an engineer and have never worked in professions that require preciseness with numbers, but I've never cared about numbers-- everything for me is an estimation (it can drive a lot of people crazy- but I'm an ENFP, remember?). A lot of moms get hung up on the numbers of weight gain during pregnancy and oh my heavens, baby weight gain (this topic requires a longer separate post). Numbers don't matter, especially since it's a construct we've made up to make sense of the world. The only thing that matters is love.
- Music makes us happy. Lillian has great taste in music and her two favorite artists are John Mayer and Owl City. Maybe because when I put on John Mayer I told her it was her dad singing and I know she loves Owl City because it is like a synthetic composition of white noise.
- Clothes do not make the woman, the woman makes the clothes! Thanks to generous friends, companies, and hand me downs, Lillian has one of the most enviable closets and she still doesn't fit into a lot of the items. Yet, she still looks freaking adorable in her onesies. We all know some people that don't have confidence unless they are wearing their red soles or designer handbag. I think people who truly know me would agree that my personality and confidence is the same no matter how I look or what I'm wearing. I hope Lillian and I can remind one another of how important it is to always be yourself no matter the labels.
- Parenting rules have changed, but love remains constant. This one cracks me up because every day my mom and I will talk about what I learned in class, online, and from doctors and then she will rebut it with parenting advice from 1980-1995 (when Danny was born to when Claire was five). I feel like the truth is some where in the middle and luckily my mom and I can agree on how much we love our LJP.
- Labor is the craziest thing in the world. I've thought about my labor every day for the past three weeks because some random thought will pop into my head or someone will ask me to share my story. I am looking forward to sharing it here, I've just been waiting for Claire to get home so we can all talk about it first and get a 360 degree perspective.
I can't wait to keep learning from Lillian!! I hope everyone has a great day!